When some consumers approach a Debt Counsellor for help, they are often concerned about how other people will think about them if they enter debt review.
This is interesting, since taking on more and more credit allows them to hide the fact that they are in financial crisis and spending more than they earn. That of course will just make the situation worse though. People often fear that getting help to get rid of their debt, might be seen by others as a weakness, as sign of failure.

In reality, carrying on as before and taking on more debt would be the real failure. It has been said that when you use credit, you are selling your future. So, taking control of the situation is a big move towards true success. Consumers often ask if the entire process can be kept a secret. They do not want their boss, family and friends to find out.  Depending on how severe the debt situation is, it is relatively easy to prevent an employer from ever knowing about a consumer’s debt review. But can debt review be hidden from your family, and is that actually a good idea?


Sometimes, one partner will start to take on extra debt without telling the other. As the debt grows, they make an effort to hide it from their partner. This may happen for a variety of reasons.
There may be a well meaning desire to shield their partner from any additional stress relating to more debt. They feel that keeping them in the dark about the true situation is a kindness.
Some couples also hand over total financial control to one partner, and the other just goes along in blissful ignorance of the finances.

Secret debt is also very common in relationships where partners talk about “your money” and “my money”. Low levels of trust and commitment can result in a separation of finances that lasts for years. In households like this, there may only be very short discussions about money and this results in a serious lack of budgeting.

Some consumers have challenges like drug or alcohol abuse or even gambling addiction. This can also lead to secret debts that are never discussed. Often credit is relied on to hide the debt.


When a family experiences a serious financial obstacle, like a medical emergency or when one partner loses their job, this situation will now force them to think about how to make ends meet, and still cover all their debt repayments. The resulting ‘collections calls’ and ‘threatening letters’ will cause massive stress.

Money stress puts huge emotional and relationship stress on families, and things can get very tough very quickly. Parents start fighting and the kids get exposed to a lot of negative emotion. The situation is less than ideal. Fortunately, many people turn to a Debt Counsellor at this point and wisely ask for some help.


Leave a Reply